The Non-Disney Truth About Group Dynamics
There’s a specific kind of frustration that comes from dealing with group dynamics that involve both males and females. Not that groups of only men or only women are magically calm either; but when you mix both sexes together, it becomes its own kind of circus.
Guys becoming performative around women.
That weird ego-switch that flips the second estrogen enters the room.
Suddenly it’s chest-puffing, jokes become louder, people talk in bigger gestures. The tendency to want to shut down kicks in because competing to look good feels stupid. Draining. Fake.
And women do their thing too.
The tendency to flirt with different men just to get reactions and create jealousy.
It’s subtle but it’s real.
Men get jealous. Women get jealous.
The whole emotional temperature shifts.
Meanwhile, the work or the mission gets ignored because the attention economy takes over. And it highlights the bitter truth of the non-Disney nature of humanity. It’s not like Friends where everybody gets along. It’s real life. Biology. Vanity. Territory. Ego.
Sometimes the honest thought is:
“Why the fuck do other men have to exist? Keep them away from me.”
I just want me and women. I don’t want to enter some social competition every time someone walks in the room. I don’t want to see men as competition, even if they aren’t. But I know how the energy shifts. I know their presence requires acknowledgment. And women aren’t going to pretend other men don’t exist that’s unrealistic.
So I withdraw instead.
Because watching men become performative and flirty can be gross in itself.
Let’s be real — part of this comes from me.
I grew up without a mother. I’m a borderline. I want to monopolize a female’s attention. It doesn’t feel OK when a woman gives another man attention in front of me. It hits a very old alarm system. Attention equals safety. Attention equals connection. Losing attention feels like losing ground, losing priority, losing the bond.
That’s why I like the one-on-one.
Me and one female is perfect. Bonnie-and-Clyde style.
Not a fan of the harem fantasy. Not comfortable when multiple women like me at the same time — that feels like chaos, not peace. Still preferable to male competition, though.
In a one-on-one, it’s focused.
Clear.
Loyal.
And I don’t have to pretend this primal, ugly, honest stuff doesn’t live inside me.
Because it does.
And pretending it doesn’t?
That’s what actually makes people fake.
Sometimes the most honest thing you can do is admit you don’t want to share attention, energy, or emotional space. Not because you hate people; but because you love intensely.
Written by: Ecudes17 with GPT-5
